The sun is still trying to peek through every so often so we’re starting to see more bikers out and about on the roads, and with that more bikes come into conflict with other traffic. Today we’re going to go through some of those things we love to hate about car drivers, and even other bikers!
Let’s get straight in with car drivers first; there are a great many things that a lot of car drivers do that irritate bikers – what makes it even worse is that a lot of bikers drive cars and actively avoid doing a lot of these things...probably.
First up: phone use. Whether it be holding it to your ear, texting in your lap or prodding it when it’s being a sat nav you can always tell when a car driver is using a phone. Getting uncomfortably close behind you, not pulling away from lights or straying over that centre line are all symptoms of a distracted driver. The best bet is to filter past them as soon as possible (and keep an eye on your mirror) or just back off. The alternative is to ride up beside them, tap on the window, shake your head, they ignore you and think all bikers are on high horses, and you just get wound up.
Next: tailgating. Bikers have an innate sense of things being too close to them, and there are few things more uncomfortable than a prat driving too closely behind you without overtaking. Not only are they increasing the risk to themselves, but if you have to stop suddenly you’ve suddenly got two hazards to deal with! The safe strategy is to physically get them to go past you (pull over or move over and wave) or reduce your speed to increase your reaction time with maybe a couple of cautionary brake light flashes. Alternatively, you could start gesticulating wildly with obscene gestures and shoot off at 100mph, only to come a cropper down the road either by police car or something worse. Meanwhile that tailgating prat would sail on past also thinking bikers are idiots.
A big one: indicating (or turn signals for anyone reading this across the pond). Now, this one can be thrown right back at bikers, but there is a very good reason why the whole BMW/Audi/Mercedes indicator stereotype exists – most of the time they just don’t use them. At roundabouts is the most irritating one, especially mini-roundabouts where you’ve got very little space to stop if you’ve not slowed enough. The best thing you can do is just assume everybody isn’t going to indicate, and if they do let it brighten your day just that little bit. If a BMW indicates then you can safely assume you’re going to win the lottery later.
A final one for car drivers: speed. Whether it be above or below the speed limit, or even both, bikers often get very irritated at the speed cars go. It’s easy to forget sometimes that a lot of bikes have power to weight ratios of supercars, so when Audrey in her Hyundai i10 puts her foot down it’s very hard for a biker to know that she’s doing her best. Conversely, there are those that simply ignore speed limits and just do whatever speed they feel like, more often than not well below the speed limit. They will be the first to say ‘it’s a limit, not a target’, however they have failed to realise they’ve become the target of the ire of 20 people who are stuck doing 40mph on a 60mph road in a straight line with endless oncoming traffic. To the Audreys of this world, keep on trying, and to those idiots who can’t reach a speed limit when it’s safe to do so, or speed up and slow down constantly without rhyme or reason, just know that one day, sometime, somewhere that karma will get you!
Now for the bikers, because equality is the name of the game:
Firstly, gear: we at Bike Stop fully advocate wearing protective gear from head to toe, and frankly the business survives because so many people believe it’s a worthwhile thing to do! There are, of course, exceptions to this. Whatever you want to call them, organ donors, squids, prats, they all have one thing in common – they're going to run out of luck. All bikers are to a degree, hence the mantra of dressing for the crash, not the ride, but these people simply do not care. It’s one thing to not care about yourself, but when you get sprawled across a bonnet of a car with a family in it because you were going too fast you suddenly impact others. That’s why other bikers get so frustrated with those who don’t wear gear – it's quite simply stupid and selfish!
Next, indicators again. Bikers have a two-fold guilt with this – either leaving them on because they forgot to cancel them, leading to the confusion of everybody at every junction they drive past, and those particular bikers (you know who you are) who take it upon themselves to make their indicators worse. Most, if not all, bikes come with very functional but sometimes ugly indicators. Rather than buying some equally bright but more attractive sets a great many bikers (again, you know who you are!) decide that they don’t want anyone to know where they’re going. Either they’re on top secret business that can be known only unto themselves, or they’ve made a critical oversight...and it’s probably the latter.
Another repeat, speed. As said before, bikes have some incredible power to weight ratios, but with that comes some serious responsibility. Newer bikes have ABS and traction control to handle things a bit better, but they don’t get past the physics of hitting something if you overcook it. Most bikers ride sensibly 99% of the time, they mostly obey road laws and filter sensibly. Car drivers tend to overlook this 99% majority and focus on that 1% who ride like they’re in Grand Theft Auto. Ignorance of double white lines, speed limits an option, and doing at least 30mph faster than any car they filter past are the name of the game. They’ve achieved peak dolt when they do it with a super loud exhaust so all the car drivers remind themselves that all bikers are arrogant lawbreakers.
Those are just a few of the things that wind me up when on a bike, or even behind the wheel of a car, feel free to leave your own in the comments!
